Friday, September 26, 2008

what do you think of the national crisis?

personally i think it stinks thats all i have to say about it

Thursday, September 18, 2008


* Accept that some days you're the pigeon,
and some days you're the statue.

* Always keep your words soft and sweet,
just in case you have to eat them.

* Always read stuff that will make you look good
if you die in the middle of it.

* Drive carefully.
It's not only cars that can be recalled by their maker.

* If you can't be kind,
at least have the decency to be vague.

* If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again,
it was probably worth it.

* It may be that your sole purpose in life
is simply ...
to serve as a warning to others.

* Never buy a car you can't push.

* Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time,
because then you won't have a leg to stand on.

* Nobody cares if you can't dance well.
Just get up and dance!

* Since it's the early worm that gets eaten by the bird,
sleep late.

* The second mouse gets the cheese.

* When everything's coming your way,
you're in the wrong lane.

* Birthdays are good for you.
The more you have, the longer you live.

* You may be only one person in the world,
but you may also be the world to one person.

! Some mistakes are too much fun
to only make once !

* We could learn a lot from crayons.
Some are sharp, some are pretty and some are dull.
Some have weird names, and all are different colors,
but they all have to live in the same box.

A truly happy person is one who can
enjoy the scenery on a detour!

Life is like a grindstone,
whether it grinds you down or polishes you
depends on what you’re made of.


tips for understanding how pain effects our lives

1. People with chronic pain seem unreliable (we can't count on ourselves). When feeling better we promise things (and mean it); when in serious pain, we may not even show up.

2. An action or situation may result in pain several hours later, or even the next day. Delayed pain is confusing to people who have never experienced it.

3. Pain can inhibit listening and other communication skills. It's like having someone shouting at you, or trying to talk with a fire alarm going off in the room. The effect of pain on the mind can seem like attention deficit disorder. So you may have to repeat a request, or write things down for a person with chronic pain. Don't take it personally, or think that they are stupid.

4. The senses can overload while in pain. For example, noises that wouldn't normally bother you, seem too much.

5. Patience may seem short. We can't wait in a long line; can't wait for a long drawn out conversation.

6. Don't always ask "how are you" unless you are genuinely prepared to listen it just points attention inward.

7. Pain can sometimes trigger psychological disabilities (usually very temporary). When in pain, a small task, like hanging out the laundry, can seem like a huge wall, too high to climb over. An hour later the same job may be quite OK. It is sane to be depressed occasionally when you hurt.

8. Pain can come on fairly quickly and unexpectedly. Pain sometimes abates after a short rest. Chronic pain people appear to arrive and fade unpredictably to others.

9. Knowing where a refuge is, such as a couch, a bed, or comfortable chair, is as important as knowing where a bathroom is. A visit is much more enjoyable if the chronic pain person knows there is a refuge if needed. A person with chronic pain may not want to go anywhere that has no refuge ( place to sit or lie down).

10. Small acts of kindness can seem like huge acts of mercy to a person in pain. Your offer of a pillow or a cup of tea can be a really big thing to a person who is feeling temporarily helpless in the face of encroaching pain.

11. Not all pain is easy to locate or describe. Sometimes there is a body-wide feeling of discomfort, with hard to describe pains in the entire back, or in both legs, but not in one particular spot you can point to. Our vocabulary for pain is very limited, compared to the body's ability to feel varieties of discomfort.

12. We may not have a good "reason" for the pain. Medical science is still limited in its understanding of pain. Many people have pain that is not yet classified by doctors as an officially recognized "disease". That does not reduce the pain, - it only reduces our ability to give it a label, and to have you believe us.

author unknown

If you want to understand , read this


Having chronic pain means many things change, and a lot of them are invisible. Unlike having cancer or being hurt in an accident, most people do not understand even a little about chronic pain and its effects, and of those that think they know, many are actually misinformed.

In the spirit of informing those who wish to understand ...
... These are the things that I would like you to understand about me before you judge me...

Please understand that being sick doesn't mean I'm not still a human being. I have to spend most of my day in considerable pain and exhaustion, and if you visit, sometimes I probably don't seem like much fun to be with, but I'm still me-- stuck inside this body. I still worry about school, my family, my friends, and most of the time - I'd still like to hear you talk about yours, too.

Please understand the difference between "happy" and "healthy". When you've got the flu, you probably feel miserable with it, but I've been sick for years. I can't be miserable all the time. In fact, I work hard at not being miserable. So, if you're talking to me and I sound happy, it means I'm happy. That's all. It doesn't mean that I'm not in a lot of pain, or extremely tired, or that I'm getting better, or any of those things. Please don't say, "Oh, you're sounding better!" or "But you look so healthy!¨ I am merely coping. I am sounding happy and trying to look normal. If you want to comment on that, you're welcome.

Please understand that being able to stand up for ten minutes doesn't necessarily mean that I can stand up for twenty minutes, or an hour. Just because I managed to stand up for thirty minutes yesterday doesn't mean that I can do the same today. With a lot of diseases you're either paralyzed, or you can move. With this one, it gets more confusing everyday. It can be like a yo-yo. I never know from day to day, how I am going to feel when I wake up. In most cases, I never know from minute to minute. That is one of the hardest and most frustrating components of chronic pain.

Please repeat the above paragraph substituting, "sitting", "walking", "thinking", "concentrating", "being sociable" and so on ... it applies to everything. That's what chronic pain does to you.

Please understand that chronic pain is variable. It's quite possible (for many, it's common) that one day I am able to walk to the park and back, while the next day I'll have trouble getting to the next room. Please don't attack me when I'm ill by saying, "But you did it before!" or Oh, come on, I know you can do this!" If you want me to do something, then ask if I can. In a similar vein, I may need to cancel a previous commitment at the last minute. If this happens, please do not take it personally. If you are able, please try to always remember how very lucky you are--to be physically able to do all of the things that you can do.

Please understand that "getting out and doing things" does not make me feel better, and can often make me seriously worse. You don't know what I go through or how I suffer in my own private time. Telling me that I need to exercise, or do some things to get my mind off of it¨ may frustrate me to tears, and is not correct if I was capable of doing some things any or all of the time, don't you know that I would? I am working with my doctor and I am doing what I am supposed to do. Another statement that hurts is, "You just need to push yourself more, try harder..." Obviously, chronic pain can deal with the whole body, or be localized to specific areas. Sometimes participating in a single activity for a short or a long period of time can cause more damage and physical pain than you could ever imagine. Not to mention the recovery time, which can be intense. You can't always read it on my face or in my body language. Also, chronic pain may cause secondary depression (wouldn't you get depressed and down if you were hurting constantly for months or years?), but it is not created by depression.

Please understand that if I say I have to sit down/lie down/stay in bed/or take these pills now, that probably means that I do have to do it right now - it can't be put off or forgotten just because I'm somewhere, or am right in the middle of doing something. Chronic pain does not forgive, nor does it wait for anyone.

If you want to suggest a cure to me, please don't. It's not because I don't appreciate the thought, and it's not because I don't want to get well. Lord knows that isn't true. In all likelihood, if you've heard of it or tried it, so have I. In some cases, I have been made sicker, not better. This can involve side effects or allergic reactions. It also includes failure, which in and of itself can make me feel even lower. If there were something that cured, or even helped people with my form of chronic pain, then we'd know about it. There is worldwide networking (both on and off the Internet) between people with chronic pain. If something worked, we would KNOW. It's definitely not for lack of trying. If, after reading this, you still feel the need to suggest a cure, then so be it. I may take what you said and discuss it with my doctor.

If I seem touchy, it's probably because I am. It's not how I try to be. As a matter of fact, I try very hard to be normal. I hope you will try to understand. I have been, and am still, going through a lot. Chronic pain is hard for you to understand unless you have had it. It wreaks havoc on the body and the mind. It is exhausting and exasperating. Almost all the time, I know that I am doing my best to cope with this, and live my life to the best of my ability. I ask you to bear with me, and accept me as I am. I know that you cannot literally understand my situation unless you have been in my shoes, but as much as is possible, I am asking you to try to be understanding in general.

In many ways I depend on you - people who are not sick. I need you to visit me when I am too sick to go out... Sometimes I need you help me with the shopping, cooking or cleaning. I may need you to take me to the doctor, or to the store. You are my link to the normalcy of life. You can help me to keep in touch with the parts of life that I miss and fully intend to undertake again, just as soon as I am able.

I know that I have asked a lot from you, and I do thank you for listening. It really does mean a lot.


turkey chili recipe

so today i had the day from hell i seriously thought bout just getting in my car and driving away, since i really have no place to go (i know i have alot of friends online of which many had offered me comfort and a safe place i couldn't make myself do it, my family does not deserve the worry of me dissapearing so thats out besides i have a quarter of a tank of gas and i can guarentee you in my thunderbird would get me to um maybe puyallup soooooooooooo notmuch of running away now is it now. since i have had time to reflect i have decided to just give it all to god and let him deal with it . after praying about it i think the solution is to list to sell on ebay and make some people some awesome deals some that they can NOT refuse sound like a plan? does to me hehe so for all those who had to listen to me today whine and complain and act like a moron i am very sorry forgive me please then on the other hand hubby came home and when he opened the door i could see how much he was going to enjoy the chili i made today was very easy to make and he really did enjoy it so i have decided to post the recipe

home made turkey chili

i browned in a frying pan with no oil or shortening i cut up half a yellow onion, 5 bulbs of garlic 2 large green peppers and i fried the ground turkey up into it i put a lid on it to hasten the cooking time and actually browning it
while that id beings browned empty 6 15 oz cans of various beans, i used pinto,black,red and kidney beans, add 2 cans of cut up tomatoes stewed are fine or whatever you have tomato wise on hand, add 3 large cans tomatoe sauce. in a pinch you can use canned spagettie sauce. add 3 packages of chili seasoning and if you like it hot like my hubby does then add several shakes of cayenne pepper keeping in miond that it will get hotter the more you simmer(spicery) add the meat mixture and mix well add simmer at least 2 hours . enjoy but remember to check the spice before adding extra cayenne. if for some reason it is to spicy you can add more sauce and also about a half cup of sugar, it will cut the spice down to a managable level. enjoy it bon apetit

life sucks

warning this is a ver negative blog post if you don;t want to read it don't sorry am having my own personal pity party here

ok heres the scoop, pay day is sept 30th i have no money till then what the hell am i going to do i mean seriously what can i do, i have tried selling a bunch of patterns seems everyone has what they want so even at half price its not selling so what do i do next ebay i guess or etsy who the hell knows i am so damn tired of being broke i want to scream i have people who owe me money but of course no one has it now when i need it. i should have learned my own lessons after my cousin robin ripped me off for almost 700.00 but nope not me i am stupid i lent money or gave stuff and said people could pay me later well guess what nothing is worse than lending family and friend money if you are not prepared to lose it dont lend it i have learned that the hard way. sucks i know so many others are worse off but i would like my fair share can anyone say stupid idiot thats me there i said it im a idiotic stupid moron who will never learn life sucks

Sunday, September 14, 2008

things are better

things are better now she called me last week and apologized told me she was sorry for being such a bitch and that she hoped i would forgive her. which of course i did then things are so tense everywhere i hate it i hope that things are going to work out for the best all around god bless everyone

Thursday, September 11, 2008

i want to thank all of you

want to say thank you to all who have helped me thru this trying time. right now we are not speaking and it is good cause i am still so hurt by her acting the way she is the support i have received is amazing you guys are the very best friends a girl could have. god bless all of you i don't know what i would do without you all thank you is not enough but is all i have i love you all

Monday, September 8, 2008

im broken hearted

well as i had posted previously about my sister nance she has some major issues and today i am trying to understand why she attacked me verbaly, when i called her i thought oh good i finally got her, well i was very sorry i bothered to call her first we talked about abbers and her first day of school and how she had left her backpack and lunch box at school and her sweater on the bus, well abbers would do that she is a sweet little girl who don;t always think about her things(unless someone else is hurting them then she takes the toys away and says no thats mine you can;t hurt it like that and is done playing with the person. well after chatting a bit about abbers i asked her how the nerve block had done in her neck and she proceeds to tell me that it don;t work so i say that sucks and after that was all she wrote. she started in on me about the meds i take for my pain and how i needed to get off them and on to a morphine pump and how i am doing nothing but causing myself trouble i told her i didn;t want to be on the morphne pump having had that when i had my back surgery i was sick as a dog with the morphine basicly i was trying to tell her what she wanted for herself was great but don;t push it off on me, she sat there and told me i was taking the strongest of my meds i c an which she is very wrong there is stronger than mine so she says to me your lying i know there is no such thing i was so upset i told her needed her to just stop i didn't want to even discuss it with her and she needed to just leave me alone but she kept it up and finally i ended up hanging up after telling her to call me when she thinks about how she is treating me, then when i tried to explain how i felt to my husband he just said not to let it worry me she probably didn;t mean it

i thought he understood what my sister meant to me but guess not i feel soooo along and tonight i am just sad very sad , but i did have one bright thing happen that made me realllly happy, my friend keesha has been having a hard time with her littlen girl being sick and in the hospital well i made keesh a lapghan out of super soft yarn and thought she would enjoy it while sleeping in her recliner(you would be suprised how many of us don;t sleep in a bed anymore) and she got it today she said it made her day but it did alot more than that it made mine too knowing someone appreciates the time i took to make something special for them thanks keesh you so made me happy with your responce to your package i love ya kiddo hang in there. to all of you who have read this novel i thank you and am very happy to call ya all friends hugs and love to all

Friday, September 5, 2008

About Me