hey ya all

been a while i know sorry, things have not been all that great it i guess i figured was better to say nothing than bitch all the time about how i feel, right now am feeling like a total failure , yesterday(the 11th actually) was my daughters birthday and i so let her down, i couldn't even bake the cake i have made for her every single year since she was 1 year old. i know she said it was alright but dammit it is NOT alright,totally frigging sucks why does this pain have to kick me in the ass so bad


went to the doc early last week as i couldnt stand the horrible pain and was asking for some help. meaning i needed something more for pain, well what i got was not the thing was asking for at all what i got was more physical therapy. mind you it has its place but i also remember the disticnt feeling of PAIN!!! although the gal who worked on me in the past told me if its hurting you so you are feeling worse is moving to fast and time to slow it down, a far cry from the clinic where i had gone before this one where the therapists attitude was no pain, no gain. something which she had the balls to say to me, omg that pissed me off.i walked out and never went back was a bunch of bs. my doctor said he is wondering if i don't have fibromyalgia . i sure have the symptoms of it one thing which is bothering me is alot of tightness around my face. first i thought was related to sinus but the doc don't think so, and now i am wondering myself, have beem taking sinus meds and isn;t making any diff so am wondering. sigh guess this is turning into a pity whine. never mind it and tell me how you all are.




on a positive note my friend melissa who is another member of crochtville.org who was my secretpal has agreed to make me a web page so i can sell my stuff online. am also working on writing up my patterns for sale. got to dosomething and i would rather make something out of my creations and put them to good work. well am off since i have to sleep if i can. no even now i hurt ,am damn sick of it snd i just want it tired of it and life treating me this way,all in all though could be worse bye for now and thanks for reading this novel please keep being my friend i love you all